The ability to fall asleep anywhere is the talent that bites back. Because you end up falling asleep everywhere.
I used to work at Questacon (the National Science and Technology Centre, a popular tourist attraction) which gets extremely quiet in February each year as the school term starts. And by “extremely quiet” I mean “post-apocalyptically quiet”. On one day, there was a total of six customers (who emerged rather shaken after entering each gallery only to meet a jibbering attendant who offered them a personalised tour, then begged them not to leave). That time of year, it was often difficult not to fall asleep. I combated it by walking around and around in circles.
But then there’s my other job: tutoring. Now tutoring only goes for an hour at a time, and is very intensive (I can generally teach an entire week’s worth of material in any subject given 1-2 lessons). You’d think that would keep me awake. You’d be wrong. One of my less-than-proud moments was when a student was rehearsing her speech for class and, while supposedly critiquing her, I fell asleep.*
*ahem*
In order to supplement my tutoring income, I sometimes do after-school care, which fundamentally involves picking kids up from school and then either watching TV or reading a book while they amuse themselves (or, sometimes, actually doing something – but not with my current family, who made it very clear the only reason I was there was in case the house spontaneously combusted. It hasn’t yet, so everyone’s happy). Last week, as both children played computer games, I laid my head on the arm of my chair – and slept.
The thing that makes this awesome? Firstly, I was still getting paid. Secondly, when I mentioned it to the parent in question, he was pleased.
Best. Job. Ever.
Also, the kids are nice.
Have you ever fallen asleep somewhere you probably shouldn’t have?
*Arguably, a valid response. Or at least, it was valid the first two times.
I feel required to insert the obligatory “tsk tsk” 😉 I gather that falling asleep during university lectures doesn’t count? I seem to be able to do that every day of the week, regardless of the amount of sleep I’ve had the past few nights!
Jolyon: Nah, that doesn’t count at all. I used to have a particular tutorial that was immediately after a class – which meant that, in a class of perhaps fifteen in a tiny room, I was always in the front row. Ten minutes later, I’d be asleep. Oh dear. Ever since uni, any speech puts me instantly to sleep.
…Wait, you fell asleep on the job and then TOLD your boss…?!?
Ben: Yep. Wanted to check it was okay for future use (not actually joking).
I have on occasion crawled under my desk (when I was lucky enough to have a corner) and taken a nap, and I once managed to fall asleep resting my chin on my hand while reading a particularly boring paper off the screen…..
Ann: Nice work! Kudos to you.
I have fallen asleep:
*In a bushfire
*In a cyclone
*Two rows up from the stage at a theatre production
*During a lecture, in the front row
*On a train, missing my stop
*In a park in brisbane
*In a movie theatre so I was woken by the cleaners.
I am the king of falling asleep in inappropriate places.
I tip my hat to you, Greg Gorton. You truly are the master of sleep in inappropriate places.