Oh, Eurovision! How I love you.
Eurovison is a Europe-wide* contest for unsigned musical artists. It is astonishingly, spectacularly bad. In some ways it is amazingly predictable. In other ways it is. . . not.
Some of my favourites included the terrifying snake woman apparently giving birth on stage, the snow ninjas, the easybake babushkas (who did extremely well despite/because of their tremulous dance moves), the sailor girl (not funny or weird – just the best song; it did very badly), the vampire sailors (why sailors? Wait for it. . .), and “Oh dear I really have drunk too much and I’m seeing a gay space knight jiggling about and backflipping – plus I’m seeing double.” Moldova was trippy once again, too.
I won’t tell you who won (unless someone asks; then I’ll put it in the comments), but it was one of the above.
Louisette was enthralled:
We playing the Eurovision drinking game – mostly with lollies. This is what we ate in a matter of hours:
And this is how. . .
Drink/Eat for any of the following:
- Any casual racism/country stereotypes
- Any on-stage costume changes
- Anyone pretending to play an instrument
- Three or more nonsense syllables/intelligible English (eg lalala, I wuv oo)
- Use of wind machine
- Anyone dressed all in white
- Key change
- Not quite getting that big note
- Someone winking at the camera
- Obvious technical problems
- Cartwheels and Back-flips. And wire work.
- Awkward jokes
- Presenters /Performers hitting on each other
- Performers/presenters getting drunk before the end
- Michal Jackson inspired moves
- Space/futuristic type costumes
- Silly hats
- Countries voting for their neighbours or obvious political votes
Until next year Eurovision. . . don’t ever change.
*Some North African countries are also involved. And Israel. Why? Because.