Author Archives: Felicity Banks Books

Pi stumbled in holding his neck. Blood leaked through his fingers. As he fainted, he whispered, “It’s Mum’s behaviour, Bell, not her blood.” * “Please, Pi, try to focus. What did you mean it’s Mum’s behaviour? What is it she does that’s so different?” He shrugged, “Who cares?” * Still not EMO. My poor brother.Continue reading “Daylight Day 66: Guest author”

Pi followed Mum around with Mum2’s blood vial clutched in his free hand. By the end of the day, the blood was dried, smelly – and un-EMO. * Still not EMO, though Pi won’t stop coming up with ever-weirder theories about Mum’s self-curing ability. He dissected our guinea pig, too. ——————————————— This is VERY short,Continue reading “Daylight Day 65: Harry Potter VS Twilight”

2 Oct EMO used to stand for ‘emotional’ – the teen subgroup that’s only happy to be sad. Now it’s become a disease eerily similar to vampirism. * My name’s Bell. I considered being EMO once, but then I saw a pretty butterfly and got over myself. Got bored and decided to save the world.Continue reading “Daylight Day 64: Story so far”

Awoke with horrible thought and went to Pi. “You said Dad drank some of the blood sample. So his BACKWASH turned it EMO?” “Yep. Ed’s, too.” * Still not EMO, despite beginning to wonder if blood tastes good. Ed says it’s like milo combined with tabasco sauce. I need to get out more. —————————————— ObservantContinue reading “Daylight Day 63: Yay for the internet”

Hello pandemic survivors. My Telstra USB modem just died, and they’re not replacing it. I will buy me some proper internet from a different company, but in the meantime here’s two days’ worth of wonderfulness: First, the signs that Bella and Edward are in an abusive relationship: http://io9.com/5413428/official-twilights-bella–edward-are-in-an-abusive-relationship Second, how the “Twilight” saga isn’t aContinue reading “Daylight Day 61-62”

Today is the 30th of November, which means two things: frantic writers, and fuzzy faces. November is also known as Movember, a month in which men (and, arguably, women) attempt to grow a moustache in order to raise money for research into prostrate cancer. It’s also National Novel Writing Month (or NaNo), in which writersContinue reading “Daylight Day 60: NaNo, anyone?”

Tried to reason with the Mums. Big mistake. They were far too busy experimenting with hairstyles to want to hear how to save humanity. * Still not EMO, despite ten parents alternately telling me to (1) cheer up or (2) stop being so shallow now the wedding’s tomorrow. Bite me. —————————————————————– This week’s guest authorContinue reading “Daylight Day 59: Guest Author”

Pi yelled, “Bell! Mum3 is sparkling. We can grab her while she’s EMO and weak!” I ran out, but by the time we reached her she was fine. * Still not EMO, despite a clone of my Mum giving me a smack for being disrespectful. I hate it when that happens. ——————————————————————– Cher out theContinue reading “Daylight Day 78: The Onion announces new social media”

2 Oct EMO used to stand for ‘emotional’ – the teen subgroup that’s only happy to be sad. Now it’s become a disease eerily similar to vampirism. * My name’s Bell. I considered being EMO once, but then I saw a pretty butterfly and got over myself. Got bored and decided to save the world.Continue reading “Daylight Day 57: Story so Far”

Dad’s hair was already darkening because of EMO. He dyed it black for the wedding. His fringe is nearly chin-length. Still not EMO. * Pi crept into my room at night with a handful of syringes. “We need their blood! The Mums. Any one will do.” I’m not sure he’s coping. ——————————————————————— First of all,Continue reading “Daylight Day 56: History of RPGs”

Mum spent an hour crying due to Mum3 fitting her wedding dress better. I definitely saw sparkles. Then she went for a walk and got better. —————————————– This is a genuine news item from a few days ago. Poor, poor Santa isn’t so jolly these days. He’s in not one, but two high-risk categories forContinue reading “Daylight Day 55: Santa and Swine Flu”

“Bell,” said Mum, “don’t be upset, but I’m going to be my own bridal party. Won’t it be fun?” “Are ANY of you EMO yet?” “Just your fathers.” ———————————————————– Where in Canberra was this photo taken from (if you’re the first to get it right, I give/send you lollies)? I THINK this is the lastContinue reading “Daylight Day 53: Tower Treasure Hunt”

Mum2 refused to get bitten. “Clones are people too. We have rights.” “We?” said Pi. That’s when Mum2 introduced Mum3, Mum4 and Mum5. ————————————– Today’s story is from someone who wishes to remain anonymous. I’ll call him/her Gertrude Versnickered. Let me know if there are formatting issues, and I’ll correct them. Idea Man Dr. BethContinue reading “Daylight Day 52: Guest Author”

I got Mum to agree that she wished there were two of her doing all that wedding prep. She sat in Pi’s cloning machine and BOOM! Two Mums. Still not EMO, despite suddenly copping twice as much wedding talk. I wish we could cure EMOs without actually talking to people. —————————————————— If you would like toContinue reading “Daylight Day 51: How to make a volcano”

2 Oct EMO used to stand for ‘emotional’ – the teen subgroup that’s only happy to be sad. Now it’s become a disease eerily similar to vampirism. * My name’s Bell. I considered being EMO once, but then I saw a pretty butterfly and got over myself. Got bored and decided to save the world.Continue reading “Daylight Day 50: Story so Far”

“I have to what now?” I asked Pi. He said, “Just ask Dad how often he bites Mum.” “But –” “We need to know. And I’m WAY too young to ask.” * Still not EMO, despite finding out Dad gives Mum hickies “every day or two”. I certainly FEEL sick. But will their grossness saveContinue reading “Daylight Day 49: Films”

“Bell! Bell!” said Pi. I said, “What?” “You were right! Mum has a natural immunity.” “Fantastic.” “I know. We have to clone her!” “Pardon?” ——————————————————————– FYI – if you live in Canberra, you’ll be able to hear me on the radio today at 8:30am on Artsound (92.7FM or 90.3 in Tuggeranong). How to make aContinue reading “Daylight Day 18: How to make a cloning machine”

Mum picked fresh tomatoes for our dinner, and once again I could have sworn she was sparkling. But when I blinked, she wasn’t. Weird. ————————————————— Since it’s vaguely related to tomatoes: Yesterday I went to Questacon just for lunch. The cafe there has excellent hot chips, and possibly the world’s most delicious sandwich. It’s madeContinue reading “Daylight Day 47: World’s best sandwich”

“Two weeks to the wedding!” Mum yelled, waking me. At least I could be certain she wasn’t EMO. Dad drew sad smileys on the invitations. ——————————————————————— What road were these photos taken from?